May. What a month.

Well here I am...two weeks into my recovery, and i might add that I am doing quite well. Except that I sometimes am bored beyond any logical explanation. I am on Season 2 of Psych and Season 6 of The Office (and off the record season 8 of My Little Pony...). And while my life has been mostly been spent staring at the television or the iPad... I have also spent a lot of time in the Bible. Specifically in Job.

Job was a book that I never really ever wanted to read because it's kind of depressing. This guy has everything. He has like a ton of farm animals and in todays society he would be like a millionaire. He has a bunch of kids and servants and land,the dude is loaded. And not only that, but his love for God was like crazy. So along comes satan, with a big bad attitude, thinking he is all that and he is like "God, let me mess with Job because I bet he will curse you." God is like, "Yea right, Job is my guy. He won't curse me. So do your worse, but don't kill him."

And satan does. He takes everything away from him and Job is left in a deep hole of sadness. He asks God questions and he curses the day he was born, but not once does he ever curse God for what happened.

So for those of you who are not really caught up on the Walterhouse life, the month of May has been completely crazy. We were planning my surgery for the 16th and we had scheduled it months in advance. Just a little over a week before my surgery we found out that my mother was pregnant. Which we all thought was totally crazy... believe me when I say that medically speaking, this would be a huge phenomenon. We found out on a Tuesday, Wednesday my parents went to the doctor to make sure this was serious and Thursday they found out that it was an ectopic pregnancy (the fetus was not where it should be and was no longer living). We really had no idea if it would affect my surgery date or what was going to happen. This was one of the most stressful weeks that I have ever experienced. (and for the record if she was pregnant and the baby had been healthy, I would have totally loved being an older sister again with a little baby in the family because how cool would that have been?!)

My mom has had a few treatments to remove the dead tissue caused by the ectopic pregnancy  and she is starting to slowly return to the point where she was. I had my surgery, stayed in the hospital for a day and have been home for two weeks tomorrow. During this time, my sister was also in a minor car accident (she, and everyone involved were fine besides some soreness). And life has been in general really stressful and difficult.

Reading in Job has really got me thinking. I am far from a billionaire and I don't have children, but this month has been really hard for my family, and it would be really easy for me to scream and yell and hate God for this. I know that God brings us through hard times, and I know that He is always walking through the hard times with us. I can never understand why we face the trials that we face. (and the Bible does say that in this world we are going to have trouble). Today though I accepted this crazy, hard and confusing month.

We have all received an abundance of help from our friends and family and I am truly thankful for each and everyone of you who have stayed with me, brought us food, stopped by to say hey and prayed for us. And though we can't really make sense of what God's plan is, we can all clearly see how he is working in the midst of us. We serve a powerful God whose plan is greater than anything that we could possibly understand. And just like Job, who walked through those hard times, we are still clinging to our Heavenly Father and trusting his will in our life.

My prayer for all of you today is that you can clearly see Christ in the midst of the hardships of life. I pray that He reveals Himself to you and that you understand that even walking through the hard and darkest times in life, He is beside you holding your hand and providing for you every step of the way.

So to end this, no I have not actually watched 8 seasons of My Little Pony. Yes, my mom is recovering. I am recovering as well, although I am still in a lot of pain. We love all of you who have supported us in this really hard time. And we named the baby Kairos which means God's time. One day I will get to meet the youngest member of the Walterhouse family in Heaven.

A Hard Realization

Well I came to a wonderful realization today while I was coloring in my princess coloring book that Kara got me. The past few days have been a struggle since I have been trying to recover. I am doing really well though. The pain is extreme still, but I am recovering much quicker compared to the last surgery. I have gotten to shower and do my hair and even put on some makeup! I just feel a little bit better when I am a little bit more put together on the outside.

But enough about my recovery, I am really writing this post because after years and years of research  I, Charlotte Walterhouse, have discovered why birds are attracted to me. It amazes me as to why it has taken so long to discover this... Pocahontas, Giselle, Snow White, and Cinderella all have birds as friends that help them get dressed and talk to them. It all makes sense now... why there have been all these birds trying to get in my room, or why there have been several congregations of squirrels and rabbits outside of my window. It even explains why I would spend hours talking to my overweight chihuahua in middle school. Brace yourselves.... and drum roll please... I am a princess.

I think I have always known deep in my heart that I am royal. I will try and embrace it now. The next time a bird gets trapped in my window I will let it in so it can help me get dressed and do my hair (somedays its just a real pain to do this on my own...you know?)

Don't worry though I do not expect you peasants to treat me any differently now that I have discovered who I really am. I will still keep my secret hidden and pretend to be normal... I mean it has worked out for so many other princesses.


Also boys, if you find a missing shoe laying about... it probably belongs to me ;)

Actual proof.

Carry On

Well here I am about two weeks into summer and let's just say with 50 degree weather it hardly seems like summer vacation. I am not complaining. I'll pretend this is my spring break since my real one was filled with playing in the snow.

Anyways, it was my goal to fit in as much fun stuff into these two weeks that I could. Unfortunately most of my friends are busy or they are still in school. My fun stuff includes driving to South Bend to pick up my little sister with the windows rolled down and the music blasting. Or cleaning and organizing my entire room before my surgery on Thursday. And doing my hair and make up every day. Or spending countless hours watching Spongebob on Netflix (so much so that his voice is still in my head when I try to go to sleep at night Bahahahahaha (That was his laugh)). So today I decided to do something I love. I decided to pull out my laptop and write. My creativity has been flowing like crazy, and with all the movies I have been watching, I think I have some awesome ideas for a movie plot. (Although let'e be honest... a movie I would write would be so ADD and probably have no plot line, but hey at least I'm having fun.)

My surgery is on Thursday, as in tomorrow is Wednesday then comes Thursday. (Thank Goodness Rebecca Black taught me the days of the week!!) I am so anxious for this to be over! For those of you who don't know... this is a surgery that was supposed to happen last summer! All I can say is Praise God for sustaining me and carrying me through some super hard times this year. It was easy for me to want to lay in bed and not move, and there were times that I did that. But I could never give up. I never understand why people say they want to give up when they are going through something challenging. This is life. You can't just give up on life because something bad happens. For me I keep going because my strength is not my own, Christ is the one who is supporting me and carrying through these hard times (and my incredible friends who make me laugh and listen to me whine about the same things over and over... especially Kara and Lauren).

So for those of you who are not connected to pop culture, and believe me, I am right there with you, I titled this blog Carry On. Carry On is a song written by the group Fun. Their lead singer looks like a Dr. Seuss character, but I love their music. Though I don't really like the entire song, I love the chorus.

If you're lost and alone 

Or you're sinking like a stone, 

Carry On

May your past be the sound, 

Of your feet upon the ground, 

Carry On. 

Now just imagine an Irish sounding melody behind this and it makes for an incredible song. So here is to the anthem of my summer. I will be Carrying On. 

Prompt 4

My prompt today was to describe a perfect world...

Describe the perfect world:

                Contrary to what many believe, the perfect world has already existed. God, in His infinite power and creativity, dreamed up, created and perfected the perfect world. I have always imagined the beginning of the world to be something that one might picture from a fairytale. There is green grass everywhere, filled with wildflowers that grow and bloom and open their faces to the warm sunshine that showers the earth. The sky is full of perfect white fluffy clouds that stand out against the blueness of the air behind them. (In my perfect world, there would be no evil birds, only ones who desire not to scare the pants off of young girls.) The sky would be filled with the most colorful or birds, whose chirping and singing create the most beautiful sound imaginable.  The green grass would be the carpet for huge mountain ranges, with perfect white caps on their tops. At the center of all of this, there sits a garden. The garden is like a rainforest, only there is less humidity, and animals of every kind roam around. There is no snake to tempt humans. God literally dwells at the center and man and woman encounter Him daily. The love they have for their Creator is the purist form of love. There is nothing that could ever separate them from their God.

                And as man and woman begin to reproduce, the population of the world increases. There is not one soul who is brought into sin. No one has a desire to sin against their Creator. They only desire to know Him in a deeply personal and unique way. There are no heart aches, nor greed, or lust, or a desire for power. Each individual only desires to grow closer to their God. They love each other, they help each other, and the word hate doesn’t even exist. There would be dinosaurs roaming the earth because they would have not missed the boat during the flood. There would be no fighting, nor yelling. No one would know what divorce is, or what depression feels like. Loneliness would be a foreign concept. Every day would be spent worshiping and serving the Creator.

                Though the perfect Earth may seem like a fairytale, the reality is that one day we will be taken to the perfect world. We only have to endure the heartaches and pains of this world for a few years. There will be a day with no more pain, no more fear, and no more sin. We will see our Heavenly Father and spend our days worshiping His majesty. Christ is coming to take His children to the perfect world that He has created. 

Stronger

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. ~2 Corinthians 12:9

My  post today is not my normal rant about waiting to find Prince Charming... nor is it about my beloved pair of grey owl socks. My post today is about my weakness. 

There comes a time in every Christians life when they realize that their strength is not dependent on themselves. I came to that realization this week. I am weak. I am hurting. I am lonely. I am broken. I am confused (mostly because of the pain meds, but there are other reasons too.)

My life is not the easiest right now. My walk is lacking the normal swagger that it is used to, my brain is fuzzy from pain medicine, and I am as tired as a two year old who has been playing on the playground all day without ceasing. I get so caught up in my daily struggles though, that I forget to take time to focus on my triumphs. 

Its been hard for me to feel Christ lately. I mostly feel empty and alone. But the past few days He has been talking to me. I am slowly beginning to understand things better now. I understand that this time in my life is not permanent. This is a small speed bump on the highway of life. And no matter how lonely I feel, I am never truly alone. I have a God who is surrounding me daily. He is pulling me out of bed in the morning, holding my steering  wheel while I drive, and offering His arm to me while I am walking on campus. 

And so it hits me. Maybe at my weakest, I am actually at my strongest. 2 Corinthians 12:9 tells me that in my weakness, Christ's power is on me. I think this thought is mind blowing. I can't do anything on my own right now. Left to myself I would probably be huddled in some darkened corner, holding my knees and rocking back and forth. And for so long I have thought that I need to be strong. If I am strong, then people will think that I am still independent, that I am not as hurt as I actually am, and that I have everything figured out. Guess what, I have no idea what is going on right now. I am a mess. And today I reached that point of holding my arms wide open and asking God to be my strength, to give me a reassurance that everything is going to be okay, and to remind me that being re-shapened (I made that word up) is not a pain free and easy process. 

I have no doubt in my mind that God is using this time in my life to build me into the woman of Christ that He has created me to be. I have assurance knowing that I am still being worked on. I won't be in pain forever, I won't be alone forever, and I surly won't be confused and completely out of it forever.In my mind, Christ has two pom poms in His hands and He is cheering me on, reminding me that I can't do this, but assuring me that He can! 

So my dear friends, please pray for me right now. Please pray that I am constantly reminded that God is reshaping me, that this is temporary, and I am part of a greater plan. If you see me and you want to give me a hug, I need a lot of those right now. And as I need support in my struggles, I also need rejoicing in my triumphs! I have reached my goal weight for my surgery, and I have gone on past it! That is super exciting for me! But, I still need encouragement, of every kind, from my friends who love me! 

I pray that maybe you found encouragement in the post too, or at least a reminder to keep walking through the hard things in life, the things that are only temporary. Let your weakness be a way for Christ to break in and be strong. Left to our self, we are nothing. But when Christ is pilot of our lives, we can be everything He has created us to be! 

March 25, 2013

I need to blog about my day, because it has been one of the single most confusing days of my life. It was cold, and I woke up, and I didn't want to get out of bed at all. But somehow, God gave me the will power to do so.

Today was hard on me physically and mentally. I was in a lot of pain, and the lack of pain medicine made it worse. By the time class was over, I was hurting so bad, I had no idea how I would make it the rest of the day. I went out to eat at Red Lobster and ended up crying into my popcorn shrimp! Yea, I was a mess.

Then I went to class. I have to be honest, at times I despise the class. I love the teacher, and the people in the class, but our discussions get so philosophical and confusing that I can hardly follow. So I was dreading going to class.

Luckily, Jesus had my back, as he always does, and it was one of the greatest classes I have ever had. Ever.

Its an English class. I just switched my major to English. Just English. And lets be honest, it isn't a degree with a specific job, like a doctor. And even though I love English, I have struggled with my decision. Like what in the world am I going to do when I graduate.

See my dream job doesn't really have a major. I want to serve Jesus. And to be honest, I have no idea what He wants me to do. I feel like there are a million possibilities  I know that as long as I am willing to serve Him, he is going to provide for me. I try not to worry. And I figure that since His plan for my life is still unknown to me, Why not major in something that I love. God can use my gifts and talents, so if I am building upon my gifts and talents, He can use them. That is why I am majoring in English, not because I think it is a major that will make me megabucks, but because at this time in my life, I know this is where God wants me. And come whatever may, I will do whatever He calls me to do.

I was constantly reminded tonight that God is always closer than He seems. He picked me up this evening, and He carried me through the rest of the day. He sent my friends who love me, to listen to me, and love me in the midst of a bad day. He restored my passion and excitement for life and he keeps reminding me this is just a period that I have to walk through. I know though that as soon as I get through this, He is going to use me in a way that I have never dreamed possible. I am blessed. To life I say, come at me bro, the Lord is my helper, I will not fear, What can man do to me.

Happy Birthday Claire!

I have the greatest little sister in the world. She is better than flowers or chocolate and all of my Barbies combined.

Today she is turning sixteen years old! Thats right....16!!!!! How crazy is that (actually I don't think it is all that crazy but aren't people like obligated to be stunned by the age of their loved ones every year?)

I wanted to dedicate this post to my favorite person in the world (sorry other people. besides you Mom and Dad. You are tied with Claire too).

I was very excited the first time I met Claire. Though I vaguely remember it. I do remember how tiny her little fingernails were, and I wanted to paint them. My parents tell me that I told the nurses to be carefully with Claire because "she's fragile."

Claire was a cute child. She had adorable little chubby cheeks! She even began her love of art at a young age when she colored on herself with permanent markers while we were moving. And Of course I thought she was fabulous or I would have never put a bunch of stickers on her when she was a baby.

I loved growing up with Claire, even though we would fight a lot. But honestly that stuff doesn't even matter in the long run of life. People used to tell me that your sister becomes your best friend, and I used to think that people were crazy because in my mind, Claire and I would never be best friends. But it's really true.

Claire is my very best friend in the whole wide world. She makes me laugh like no one else. She knows exactly what to say to me when I am having a rough day. She has a beautiful heart for her friends and loved ones. She can make anyone laugh! I love her very much! I love her outgoing and talkative personality, I love her imagination and her creativity, I love her boldness and her decisiveness. Claire is one of a kind and I am so grateful for that!!

So have a great birthday Claire! You are so special to me! I am blessed to be your older sister!!