March 25, 2013

I need to blog about my day, because it has been one of the single most confusing days of my life. It was cold, and I woke up, and I didn't want to get out of bed at all. But somehow, God gave me the will power to do so.

Today was hard on me physically and mentally. I was in a lot of pain, and the lack of pain medicine made it worse. By the time class was over, I was hurting so bad, I had no idea how I would make it the rest of the day. I went out to eat at Red Lobster and ended up crying into my popcorn shrimp! Yea, I was a mess.

Then I went to class. I have to be honest, at times I despise the class. I love the teacher, and the people in the class, but our discussions get so philosophical and confusing that I can hardly follow. So I was dreading going to class.

Luckily, Jesus had my back, as he always does, and it was one of the greatest classes I have ever had. Ever.

Its an English class. I just switched my major to English. Just English. And lets be honest, it isn't a degree with a specific job, like a doctor. And even though I love English, I have struggled with my decision. Like what in the world am I going to do when I graduate.

See my dream job doesn't really have a major. I want to serve Jesus. And to be honest, I have no idea what He wants me to do. I feel like there are a million possibilities  I know that as long as I am willing to serve Him, he is going to provide for me. I try not to worry. And I figure that since His plan for my life is still unknown to me, Why not major in something that I love. God can use my gifts and talents, so if I am building upon my gifts and talents, He can use them. That is why I am majoring in English, not because I think it is a major that will make me megabucks, but because at this time in my life, I know this is where God wants me. And come whatever may, I will do whatever He calls me to do.

I was constantly reminded tonight that God is always closer than He seems. He picked me up this evening, and He carried me through the rest of the day. He sent my friends who love me, to listen to me, and love me in the midst of a bad day. He restored my passion and excitement for life and he keeps reminding me this is just a period that I have to walk through. I know though that as soon as I get through this, He is going to use me in a way that I have never dreamed possible. I am blessed. To life I say, come at me bro, the Lord is my helper, I will not fear, What can man do to me.